A lot has happened in these few weeks. The biggest new so far is that my book, Snow in Hell, will finally be coming out this Halloween! Just in time for All Hallow’s Read! A lot more information will be coming up on this soon!
Prior to the release, I wanted you guys to get to know my characters just as well as I do. So Margot Grant and Jade Wilde, reluctantly agreed to speak to me. This is how it went…
Sophie- Ok, so first of all thank you for coming here guys, I know you’ve been really busy and- Margot would you mind putting that cigarette out in my house?
Margot – Is this gonna take long? Because, I have, you know, like a life.
Jade – Why do people always think that I’m a woman?
Sophie – What?!
Jade – Well it’s just that all of your audience think I’m a girl!
Margot – Ha! People think you’re a girl that’s hilarious!
Jade – It really is not Margot.
Margot – Oh come on Jade! It is a little bit funny! Don’t cha-
Sophie – Guys please! Jade I think we’ve now all clearly established that you’re a man. Can we actually start the interview now?
Margot and Jade – Fine.
Sophie – Phew, ok, thank you! Now for people who don’t know who you guys are, how about describing yourselves a bit.
Jade – Well, hello readers, my name is professor Jade Wilde, I’m from the island of Bequia and me and my partner here have worked on many scientific projects that your minds have only yet to discover. For example, Nomad, the first ever space craft to leave the universe, the portable Jonovicator, far more advanced than your average journal-
Margot – Fucking hell Jade! Don’t bore them to death. Why not tell them your favourite colour while you’re at it.
Jade – I was just getting to that.
Margot – Jade, seriously, stop.
Jade – But Sophie said-
Margot – Fuck what she said, we need to sound cool. Look, let me go first.
Sophie – I’m all ears.
Margot – Cool, ok, well I’m Margot Grant and me and my buddy Jade here have done some pretty amazing stuff. I’m talking vampires, explosions, other worldly shit.
Jade- You’re making us sound like a Ridley Scott film…
Margot – Well you didn’t do much better!
Sophie – Moving on swiftly, how did you feel your characters were portrayed?
Margot – Well to be honest Sophie, you made me out to be a pretty mardy bitch.
Jade – I wonder why…
Margot – It just really pissed me off, I don’t shout that much.
Jade – Well in the lab you are prone to losing your temper.
Margot – I am not!
Sophie – Alright Margot, calm down, there’s no need to be so aggressive.
Margot – Hey man, take it up with yourself, you created me!
Sophie – Fair point.
Jade – In all seriousness, I thought we were portrayed pretty accurately, I feel like I learnt a lot.
Margot – I think I’m going to throw up in my mouth.
Sophie – Go on Jade.
Jade – The journey was both a mental and physical one, I learnt a lot more about who I was and not to be so timid and that I could act as well as just think.
Margot – I learnt that other worlds have some pretty messed up drinks at their bars.
Sophie – I’m sure they do.
Margot – Like seriously, you guys should go to The Halo and Harp, it’s crazy. It’s just like bars stacked up to the ceiling on top of one another and the seats are spinning ladders, great joint.
Jade – It’s a shame those people are idiots.
Margot – Are you going on about Damien again? Seriously, he’s not actually that bad once you get to know him.
Jade- Can we please not discuss this in front of Sophie, it’s a private matter!
Sophie – Guyyssss, interview.
Margot – Well go on then we’re waiting!
Sophie – Favourite and worst parts?
Jade – Well I didn’t really enjoy getting beaten up, or crawling round in the rubbish tip or – wait come to think of it, I didn’t enjoy most of it!
Margot – Well, I love the experience, it was amazing. I’m sure that will come across when the book is released.
Sophie – Yeah, I’m sure it will… Now-
Margot – Ok, thanks Soph, it’s been fun, it really has but we’ve godda shoot.
Sophie – But, I’ve not finished!
Margot – Just send us the questions over email, come on Jade.
Jade- Nice meeting you!
Sophie – Thank god that’s over.
Below: Margot and Jade- a writer’s impression. (I never said art was my strong point.)